“My story goes way back when I was pregnant with my 2nd daughter, but it was my 3rd pregnancy. I was 3 1/2 months pregnant and was feeling a lot of abdominal pain. I had my appointment that afternoon, so didn’t think it was an emergency and waited to see the doctor then. When I arrived, I was taken to get a sonogram, quickly told there was no heart beat and recommended a DNC. Which I had no idea what it was, just that if I didn’t have it now I would bleed to death. It was a nightmare to go into an office for a check up, told your baby has no heart beat, taken into another room, prepared for a DNC, that I was not explained what it was. Just heard a machine go on, procedure done with no sympathy to put to sleep or anything. Just feel and see my baby pulled out of me and told, Ok its over, Get dressed, see you in my office, Then told, “it happens you can go back to work right away.” I was left with an emptiness, feeling what did I do wrong, could I have prevented this. Yet, no support from anyone understanding my feelings, just told. You are young, you will have more. Which I did get pregnant again, but walked on eggs shells scared to move and think that if I do to much of anything I will lose this baby too. Which I was told by that doctor because I didn’t wait the full 6 months, he just firmly told me, “you will lose this pregnancy too, because you were not careful.” It was a silent depression and anxiety that I endured because no one understood. It wasn’t explained to me never nor did I not educate myself on this matter until years down the road, my 3rd daughter experienced perinatal depression. We lost her to suicide because nor I or she knew postpartum can start during pregnancy. That’s when my educational journey started and I have learned so much to help others. Even my two other daughters had postpartum depression and the other with postpartum anxiety. I founded a nonprofit – www.kassyskause.org in my daughter’s name.”

– @kassyskause